Bits of Life

Odd Neighbor – Faux Husband

Posted on: March 14, 2014

I have an odd neighbor who deposits his cigarette butts in my flower pots, bird feeders and anywhere he wishes on my side of our shared back porch.  We hardly speak, so I can’t fathom why he does this.

And no, I don’t think he’s trying to get my attention.

Consequently, I find I blame him for anything that goes awry outside and even inside my apartment.

I’ve been divorced for over 20 years and one of the first things I learned is – you are the only one in the house to blame.  So instead of saying “Who put my…”, I quickly realized it was “Me, Myself and I put this or did this”.

However, I have now discovered how quickly our human nature finds a scapegoat which formerly was in the guise of a spouse.   I had a wind chime out back that was falling apart – must be my neighbor, he’s clipping the plastic filaments that hold it together.  My stainless steel compost container disappeared from the porch – it must have been him.  The lid comes off my trash can – him again.

Two nights ago, I began hearing scratching noises from the bathroom and pecking sounds on the window – 2 floors up.  Night bird or tiny mouse – no, must be my neighbor scratching on the wall through the medicine cabinets.

This morning when I took a shower I noticed that the spring-loaded shower rod was not even.  The side adjacent to my bedroom wall was creeping down the wall.  It had moved a couple inches.  Perhaps sounding like scratching as it slid!


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